Passing the tournament room, we often see moms, dads, grandmothers, grandfathers and other relatives, sincerely worried about their young players. Victory and defeat in chess or checkers tournaments sometimes perceived as personal, so, in the pursuit of happiness, parents often use very harsh methods. We would like to share with You own observations and stories of friends trainers, where we will talk about the behavior of the so-called group of “support”, the reactions which lay hatred of chess or checkers.
Parents who use the following methods can sincerely wish good to their children and do not realize that such they harm, not benefit. The purpose of this article was not to condemn such parents, but to help them see that such methods are losing and they should be changed. Many things happen automatically – after all, we are not taught psychology. To help these parents we would like to recommend this site is dedicated to the education of children and family relationships. Sure that the materials contained in the articles of the site, will help to avoid many complications and errors.
Quite often you can see the following picture. During the tournament, when after losing the baby emerges from the playing hall, he is met by an angry parent who instead of support unleashes a barrage of mad frustration, accusing or blaming the child in failure. Not seldom heard of the word “idiot” or “stupid”. All further complicated by the fact that a similar pattern is observed by rivals, friends, other parents, coaches, etc. Can imagine that feels young player and what he wants at the moment. Of course not victory.
Sometimes, before the tour or another party, wanting to reassure the child, some parents remind, much of it spent money, effort, time, and that for this reason he needs to win. Probably, in other situation that lead to the desired, but in sports gives the opposite result.
According to observations by trainers, such “support” causes fear before the party. A child who is subjected to such pressures and public humiliation, starts to behave at the chessboard not confident. Often afraid to make a move. About that can speak hanging over the figure or a chip hand where a young player does not dare to touch, and with a touch, a long time could not decide which to make a move. Sometimes nervous breakdowns. Realizing that does not win, the child begins to cry right during the game. Such situations lead to nervous shocks during the competition, which not only hinders the learning process, but also cause the baby hadn refuses chess or checkers.
The following method, which is used by parents to enhance the professionalism of a young sportsman, is in late-trainingWho wants to do at 22.00 or 23.00 night? Not every adult is able to benefit from such training, does that help a decade of little man? Of course not. In the context of this issue, I want to remind that in the article “How to plan better time to exercise” international grandmaster and experienced coach Ava Suleymanova recounts the best mode of day of the player.
Another method that is widely used by parents for the education of the “champion” is the assault. Unfortunately, and in spite of the generally known negative effects of such a model of education, many are still unable to abandon it, and some even argue that this is the most effective way of educating the winner. Often such “effective” interaction with children is held under a loud slogan: “Strict upbringing!” or “tight rein!”, and on the very pertinent comments coach about this one can often hear in reply: “My child, what I want, I do!”. I think that there is nothing to comment, the conclusions are quite obvious.
Once passing through is described, the child may wish to give up playing chess or checkers. Not wanting this to happen, some parents can invent reasons, convincing their child not to leave the sport. For some reason, a weighty argument is the prophecy of becoming a street cleaner or a cleaner toilets. And to such comparisons, without a word, is used by many. Where does it lead? The lack of confidence in themselves, their abilities, and as a result to appearance of fear in the child before failures in chess or checkers.
It is clear that all of the methods described the so-called support is always used with the best of intentions. We all wish success and happiness for their children, but let’s remember that “good intentions paved the road to hell”. The practice is similar way to raise the child chess or draughts champion leads only to what causes resentment and resistance to this sport.
Author Yulia Semenova
creator Web-club Fenix-64